A friend who cares...

"Still, when we ask ourselves which persons in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not-knowing, not-curing, not-healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is the friend who cares."

Henri Nouwen, from Out of Solitude: Three Meditations on the Christian Life

Bread for the Journey

The first book I purchased for my new Kindle is a book I've read over and over... and over and over. And every time I discover something new. Or discover something old which I truly needed to hear anew.

I first read Henri Nouwen's Bread for the Journey not alone but "in communion" with a "breakfast club" of old and new friends in Pella, Iowa. This was at least 2-3 years before seminary. I highly recommend the approach. We each would read the short daily readings -- or, sometimes, read all seven daily readings the night before our weekly Tuesday-morning-gathering at a local restaurant. We'd highlight or underline or put question marks in the margins; and then we'd talk about what had "hit home" or what we didn't quite understand. Of course sometimes we'd just talk about the frustrations and hurts and challenges in our lives without regard to the book. But more often than not Henri Nouwen's wise and compassionate words would find a home in the various and varying situations and circumstances of our lives. Together we grew more and more open to "the voice calling us God's beloved sons and daughters." I miss that group.



Anyway, I could probably cut and paste this selection from somewhere on the web... but it's worth retyping... and so that's what I've done... to let the words become a part of me in yet another way...

And I hope the words become part of you as well...

January 10
Growing Beyond Self-Rejection

One of the greatest dangers in the spiritual life is self-rejection. When we say, "If people really knew me, they wouldn't love me," we choose the road toward darkness. Often we are made to believe that self-deprecation is a virtue, called humility. But humility is in reality the opposite of self-deprecation. It is the grateful recognition that we are precious in God's eyes and that all we are is pure gift. To grow beyond self-rejection we must have the courage to listen to the voice calling us God's beloved sons and daughters, and the determination to live our lives according to this truth.

Henri J.M. Nouwen
Bread for the Journey: A Daybook of Wisdom and Faith